YOU SHOULDN'T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS, THEY ARE MORE SCREWED UP THAN YOU THINK

Thursday 18 July 2013

One particular night.

teaser

A bright room. In my room. Hostel.

Silent. there is no raindrops sound and i'm sitting on my red bed holding little strawberry pillow while typing this. my roommate, ecan was about to go to the bathroom when i looked at her. she opened the door and zooooshhhhhhh! the sound was so smooth but strong.

what was that? I thought it was nadia and kayan pulling their stuff from the other block.

No babe, it's raining outside. and i moved my head to the window and my hand touched the window to open it, so that i could see it clearly. is it raining?

yes, it's raining outside. it's not just raining. we got wind that come together with the rain.

i smiled and closed the window. back to the seated-place before and continue typing. it's raining outside. Alhamdulillah.

few mins thinking on what do i have to write right here. i'm paused.

looking at the curtain hanging at the window. i intend to look outside the window and enjoy the raindrops...it was my first intention. unfortunately, the curtains hung became a barrier. i'm paused..again.

mak ayah

my head turned to the left, and my sight touched the wall. it was a calendar hung at that wall. my parent's photo was clipped at the calendar. that smile. that smile painted on mak and ayah faces make me calm. my feeling is fragile. and i'm homesick.

some sounds and light yellow light showed-up from the phone. why babe? what happened to you. nah, it was battery. my phone battery is low. no credit also. pity me.

i've erased my whatsapp account for the sake of my money. i want to be thrifty. so, it's gone..with the memories.

ouh, today ed inbox me on facebook. i'm kind of shocked. happy at the same time for sure. he still remember me. but, did he miss me? i'm curious. question with no answer. i didn't ask him about it. i let him to start the conversation and i respond. he's still at his granny place which is at Pakistan. he'll be there until Eid.

tonight is my second night at my new room. my roommates and i moved from our old room as we're not comfortable with the surrounding. it was my very first time felt insecure doing my laundry alone at toilet. i'm talking about my old room. my old room situated at another block, the block is at the back of the hostel. the most precious thing that i still feel bad to leave is its window view.

the view from the window is fascinating. we could watch sunrise moment in every morning. it was so beautiful and i impressed with the view. i have snapped some photos so that i can look at it if i miss that moment.

as i said previously that tonight is my second night here, it's happy to be here. the room is nearer to the toilet and my bestfriends also living at the next door.

but, i couldn't fell asleep last night. i feel something is not right and it was creepy when i think about it again. i scared. as i felt that way, i put myself in my black blanket. i moved my body close to the wall and hug my little strawberry pillow tightly. that's the way if i want to make myself secure with the situation, move your body close to the wall. i felt asleep then.

and it's still raining outside. i open a new tab and google up my facebook account. checking my notifications and sign out. what more to do? i have to end up this post and publish it before make a move to the toilet and prepare for sleep.

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